The Mystery of Identity

We're all products of what we want to project to the world. Even people who don't spend any time, or think they don't, on preparing themselves for the world out there–I think that ultimately they have for their whole lives groomed themselves to be a certain way, to present a face to the world.

–Cindy Sherman

        I crave diversity; I need it. Society bores me. Television, magazines, movies, even art becomes monotonous to me after too long. Looking through any mainstream magazine becomes a game to me, looking for someone who is not thin, white, conventionally attractive, distinctly “man” or “woman.” At a relatively young age I realized I could not rely on mainstream media or popular culture for representations I could relate to. As I got older and came to terms with my identity as a queer-identified and gender-fluid person, I realized that unless people like me fight back, the identities of others will continue to be erased and ignored.
       Society is exclusive, allowing only those who fit preconceived notions of normality and beauty in. Gender-variant people, LGBTQ people, disabled people, people of colour, and others are hard pressed to find positive and accurate depictions and representations they can relate to in popular culture, including art. In my studies of art history, I have come to understand that art does not exist in a vacuum: the art we consume and create reflects the society we live in. As a result, art has not always been open to everyone, particularly portraiture. Frustrated by media and lack of visual diversity in society and art, and also fueled by interest in the concept of identity, I chose to paint people who have been underrepresented in art and media at large.

       For instance, people of different gender and transwomen particularly are often caricatured or made the butt of jokes in media presentations; or they are assumed to be drag queens and thus for the cisgender population's entertainment. In Changes, I challenge this view. The person shown is real: she is not a clown, not a “freak,” “a man in woman's clothing,” or confused. Her experiences differ from most women, but like other women, she struggles with body dysphoria and the idea of not being “pretty enough.”

       While such individuals may indeed lead “alternative” lifestyles, I do not intend for my work to be “alternative” portraits. The people in my portraits are close friends, strangers, and acquaintances. In some way they have all experienced resistance from the mainstream culture due to some aspect of their identity– or for even daring to exist at all. Despite the danger of doing so, they dare to be different. They live. We realize bodies can be political, as they can be hidden or revealed. Painting is an invitation to gaze, and I want my audience to look at these people while resisting the urge to apply a reductive cultural ideal or vision onto them. While I cannot tell each person's entire story or multiple identities, I do depict at least one.

       Borrowing my palette from nature, I depict my work in a detailed, photo-realistic manner, giving attention to everything displayed. No part of the canvas is less important than another, as each part has a role in the story shown. By using environment (including props, like an altar or a construction of paper chains and pill bottles) and body language, I seek to create intimate and interesting narratives which show the viewer some facet of the person's identity while at the same time empowering the individual painted.

–Em Stamey